Tuesday, March 27, 2012

What is “Best.”

Every one always says; “you need to do what is best for you”. But what does that really mean? Take a simple situation I am in right now; to keep working or to go off soon due to my pregnancy. Some people are saying it is best for me to go off so I don’t have so much stress, and my body can rest. Some people say it’s best I go off soon to get my head wrapped around being home and let go of work before I have baby. But is it best for me financially to go off work? Is it really best for me mentally? How do you know what is best?

This has  been a huge struggle for me; I really don’t know what is best for me. I enjoy my work; yes I find it exhausting and stressful, but I know being home I find myself unmotivated and get depressed easier. I am still capable of doing my job, so shouldn’t I keep doing it? My doctor hasn’t said I need to go off, so why should I? The financial stress of waiting for EI is one that is on my mind alot, so shouldn’t I keep making as much money as possible? I really don’t know what to do.

The same goes for so many situations. How will I know what is best for my baby, or me or Dean. How do you know what is right until you try and see? I know I want to be happy, and that means doing what I want, problem is I don’t know what I want! I go through so many thoughts each day around if I want to be off or keep working, in the end I just keep working because it is easier and I feel it is “best” for now. I will probably keep doing this until a day comes that I just can’t get my butt out of bed enough days in a row that I feel I should stop working. For me right now that is what is best I think… we shall wait and see!


  1. In all honesty, I would keep working until you physically can no longer work. With my first pregnancy I had vacation so was off over three weeks before the baby came. With #2 I was off only one week when he arrived.
    As you already know, maternity leave is going to be very isolating for you - and this is without even factoring in all the sleep deprivation, hormonal roller coaster and any other challenges having a newborn will throw into the mix.
    For those reasons, I'd say keep your routine as it is now until you feel you're totally just checked out mentally and physically from your job which tends to be a week or two before your due date.
    You will benefit from the normalcy and also the regular human contact - which I know makes a huge difference for me. 12 months of being home with a baby is a long time already...looking back I wish the first time around I had worked until I could no longer work because all I did was sit around waiting and waiting for the baby to arrive and I was bored out of my skull :-P
    I will also say that financially, maternity leave is difficult - going off on sick leave will only prolong that.

  2. I agree with T. Now, as a disclaimer first- YOU know yourself and what you need. And you're right-you may just know in the moment-not ahead of time or planned. With my first I went off work a week before my due date. With my second, I worked up until my due date. I took 6 months mat leave wih my first, and 2 weeks with my second because I ran a home based business. That's that felt right for me. (well, not the second mat leave. That sucked) I would rather be busy and productive then sitting around just waiting. If you can still physically and mentally work-financially and emotionally-I'd do it. Good luck!