Well I am starting to fear that going off work while I do think necessary was a bit early. I’ve been off for 2 weeks now and I am starting to feel lonely and isolated. I knew it would happen, but I was hoping it wouldn’t be so soon.
It is hard with Dean gone 9 – 10 hours a day working. I can’t blame him, and I don’t. I just find it hard to get motivated to do some things I want/should/could do. Part of it is being 37 weeks pregnant. If I go up and down the steps too much I get lightheaded and sore very fast. I am nervous about going out for a walk alone in case something happened. And maybe that is silly of me, but I don’t know my neighbours and I just am unsure about it. The stuff that I should do is cleaning and that sort of thing, and it just seems like alot of work to me. I know what will happen though, Dean will have some time off and we will get the house tidy together, that is normally how it goes. So I will get by, I am just left hoping this baby comes sooner and sooner!
Some random thoughts in my life;
I am starting to think of after the baby is here and what I want my life to look like. I definitely want to show this baby healthy living and that will mean making some changes back to our old ways. While pregnant there was a time when I was told I HAD to gain weight. So we made some changes that weren’t too drastic but still when you want to lose/not gain weight it’s hard. For example we switched from 1% milk to 2, and we started buying real ice cream rather than frozen yogurt. My eating has also still been pretty erratic with Dean working over suppers and me just not feeling like cooking/eating. I nibble here and there but I will really have to work on getting a routine down for eating. I have managed to get some meals in the freezer since being off work, and hope to get some more in there. Also we are meal planning a bit better and trying to stick to a firmer budget so less snacks and thoughtless spending will help.
Another thought… Dean was suppose to run the Bluenose Marathon this year, due to events in our life he wasn’t able to train so he decided to move it to next year. I think it’s great and I have even been looking into a training schedule for him; I want to support him in this as it’s one of his bucket list things. It also has me thinking about my small in comparison 5K I want to run someday. I am getting excited to be able to go out for walks with baby and maybe even start running… we will see but it’s exciting to think about!
Sleep is evading me it seems. I cannot find a comfortable position at night and when I do I am awake to roll over or pee in an hour or two. Last night I was up from 4 until sometime after 5, I was wide awake but knew I needed more sleep. Besides with out the baby here right now what else is there to do at 4 in the morning?